Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length



News: Here, in the dread tribunal of last resort, valor contended against valor. Here brave men struggled & died for the right as God gave them to see the right. - Adlai Stevenson

Author Topic: dilemma  (Read 2438 times)

Dave the plumber

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 549
    • Email
dilemma
« on: January 21, 2015, 09:51:31 AM »
  guys, I'm in a bit of a quandary here and I need your opinions. I'll explain why;

  My wife and I have a good friend, let's just call her 'Lisa', who has always been interested in my civil war stuff and is fascinated about digging 'treasure' out of the ground metal detecting.  She is the one female that when she comes to our house actually looks at my stuff, and wants to know what all I have dug up lately. Rusty chunks and pieces of cannonballs don't really do it for her, but anything from a bullet on up peaks her interest. Well, Lisa got herself a metal detector for Christmas.
   Now, it's necessary here to tell a little background about Lisa. Lisa is single. I believe she is about 29 years old. She hails from Texas, has that nice silky Texas drawl. And she is damn proud of her Texas roots, as she has a nice Texas state tattoo on her hip, the one that has the flag colored in it. I've seen her drop her drawers loose to show that tattoo a couple times......
   And she is good lookin',  my oh my !!  Long blonde hair, crystal eyes and proper sized everywhere. She used to be a Maxim model in her past life. A real head turner.  Now she is one of the local 'Budweiser girls' at local events and her and I go to a lot of concerts together as she gets free tickets [ of course] . I'm her concert buddy. That's how I have gotten to see that tattoo, because backstage [ of course] she loosens the pants to show any rock star from Texas her tattoo. But she is a good girl, nothing like a groupie.
   Lisa lives on Wrightsville Beach. She wants me to show her how to metal detect. Luckily for us, we can look for gold and diamonds [ her favorite ] right on the beach, or trudge  off into the woods  to look for Civil war relics [ which she finds fascinating ].
    She is also a bit of a fashion-ista. And here upon lies my problem, and I need your opinion. She wants me to take her out to buy some camo, clothing because she wants to look the part. My dilemma is do I  'steer' her to buy a nice lightweight camo bikini for beachhunting [ picture that famous photo of Ursula Andress on the beach from James Bond's  Dr. No, but with an entrenching tool slung on her hip ! ], or do I get her frumpy camo for digging in the woods [ I will let her know how after being in the woods we need to search each other very, very carefully for chiggers and ticks at the end of the day !! }
     And then what should I tell my usual diggin' partner, that we can't go digging anymore and I have someone else now ??   I mean I want to stay friends with him.....  what should I do ??!!



CarlS

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 2074
    • Email
Re: dilemma
« Reply #1 on: January 21, 2015, 10:59:06 AM »
If you have to ask.....  ;D
Best,
Carl

Steve Phillips

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 203
    • Email
Re: dilemma
« Reply #2 on: January 21, 2015, 01:16:56 PM »
You write well

pipedreamer65

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 289
    • Email
Re: dilemma
« Reply #3 on: January 21, 2015, 03:56:27 PM »
Damn, quite certain that I have watched pornography that started out similar to this..... 

Roy A

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 107
    • Email
Re: dilemma
« Reply #4 on: January 21, 2015, 04:40:06 PM »
Pics or she isn't real.... 8)

Daveslem

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 256
    • Email
Re: dilemma
« Reply #5 on: January 21, 2015, 09:20:10 PM »
This sounds like something out of Penthouse's Forums. Funny. I vote bikini camos.
Later,
Dave Slemmer

gflower

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 105
Re: A Divorce Lawyer
« Reply #6 on: January 21, 2015, 11:34:40 PM »
I think you should first get an anti nuptial agreement or  donate all of your shells to a worthy place ala Tom Dicky or sell them all at a fire sale before your new partner bends over for that first "Good Signal"! If I recall from my state law reviews that The Great State of North Carolina is the only State with  an alienation of affection law! That means girlfriends get their own special lawsuits. Would love to help you with some pre-divorce planning but can't give legal advice anymore. My digging partner has a crew cut and whiskers see down here in the sunshine state it is presapposed that my wife was gifted all my relics upon marriage! I would have the burden of proving they were not gifts! So I have just found that after all those years of digging no women or 10 for that matter is worth me not waking up to my Hard earned "Heavy Metal". Now that being said send a photo of this unicorn or at least that Texas Tat. Gary

relicrunner

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 99
Re: dilemma
« Reply #7 on: January 22, 2015, 04:31:20 PM »
The main question I have: are you bringing Lisa to the Dalton show this year instead of the buddy you has with you last year?

Dave the plumber

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 549
    • Email
Re: dilemma
« Reply #8 on: January 22, 2015, 06:07:00 PM »
               I'll answer you all now;
JIM RELIC RUNNER -  that would be a good way to drum up some more business, I'm sure sales would be up !!  I know you guys would be hanging around my table all day blocking paying customers though.   Might even have a shot at outselling Carl and Mike, if I could keep the aisle clear !!  But, if I brought her, than what Mr. GFLOWER gave me as legal advice would become a priority and a costly affair. Maybe I can pay him in cast iron to represent me ??!!  And if  she got bored, I would hate for her to run into obviously porn versed perv's like DAVESLEM and PIPEDREAMER65 who would be buggin her to  let them take her out to the parking lot to show her their  new ' deep seeking detector ' or whatever they call their willies on the 'other' forum !!  And finally to ROY A  -damn right she's real !!
 

CarlS

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 2074
    • Email
Re: dilemma
« Reply #9 on: January 22, 2015, 07:10:28 PM »
Good question RelicRunner.  If David did, he'd sure win the Dalton Show award for "Most Interesting Person".  He won it hands down last year and I think it sounds like he'd be a lock this year too!
Best,
Carl

John D. Bartleson Jr.

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1786
    • Email
Re: dilemma
« Reply #10 on: February 08, 2015, 08:11:44 PM »
David,
I think you had best get her interested in your snakes.
John ::)